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  • Resistance – What’s Needed Now?

    Resistance – What’s Needed Now?

    Thoughts – ‘I don’t want to write. I can’t think of what to say at the moment. Actually, I don’t want to think about doing any work – even work that I love!’

    Noticing that I was resistant to anything over the Christmas period and into January, I thought to myself; well, if I feel this way and it’s part of my career, I surely shouldn’t be posting to others about the expectation of motivation and ‘New Year resets’!

    So, I wasn’t even going to write this. But as the weekend began and the plan to ‘take down’ Christmas was ahead of me, I got the niggle of inspiration. And as I wrote those first few sentences, the words came tumbling out.

    I’ve always been authentic with what I write and create, so whilst I respected others in the industry that did want to put out email newsletters, blogs, promotions and motivating posts about the new year, it just didn’t feel right for me.

    I just kept deleting email after email that was anything about work…

    Or about networking event planning for 2026. No thanks, I’m fine right here in my bubble – ‘That’s a next year task’. I also purposely didn’t go on LinkedIn, only Instagram. LinkedIn somehow feels like ‘the office’!

    Maybe also, I was a little resistant because it gave me the feeling that I should be writing or creating something. If I saw something great or inspiring, then I’d think I should be doing that too and it would give me a task I didn’t really need.

    But even when I thought about doing something, looked through my notes and inspiration to think about what it could look like, it was just a blank page that I didn’t know how to fill… and then I’d let myself get distracted again by the holidays, perhaps with a pang of guilt or panic that the spark wasn’t there but not enough to make me feel uneasy, it seemed that I was internally pleased to be choosing simplicity.

    If you recall ‘Choice’ was on my vision board at the start of last year as a key guide for me.

    I have been intentional with my choices mostly and when I haven’t, I’ve noticed how different it’s felt.

    Throughout autumn, I could literally feel my mind and body screaming at me to slow down. I kept thinking, is this burnout? I don’t think so, but if I had kept up that pace, maybe it could have been. So, when I finally did give my mind and body permission to slow down mid-December, I think they just kept wanting more time. I could have pushed though this and got myself into stuff, I’m sure of it, but instead, I listened a bit and let go of thinking what I should do and instead considered what I needed to do.

    A great coaching question to myself here: ‘What’s needed now?’

    The last few weeks, I’ve been seeing lots of posts about Wintering, about not rushing straight into the new year with rigidity. I’ve always quite liked January. The feeling of a fresh, blank canvas to create new chapters and I do always like the idea of taking my time and doing some trial and error until the year really gets going. I love the goal / feeling of being ‘ready’ for Spring. That for me is mentally, physically and professionally.

    So, I am doing a cleanse – my body is crying out for it! But otherwise, January will be a slower pace: yoga, gym, walks, reading, inspiration and time to really be present before the chaos and pace lands on us again.

    And I’m excited to work on my 1% Diary (Stephen Bartlett) over the next 3 months. I’ve set 3 important goals that have been key for me for a long time and haven’t been tackled. But I’ll do these with a comfortable kindness, not a rigid ‘must not fail’ attitude. The diary is very clever in how it supports you to do this.

    So, this wasn’t the blog I planned, but it is where I’m at now.

    Let’s see where the year goes from here. I’ll be taking the time that I need this January and will keep choosing and following my instincts.

    And as you step into your own January, perhaps pause and ask yourself: If I really listened in… what’s needed now?

  • Highs aren’t meant to last forever… They’re meant to remind us what’s possible.

    Highs aren’t meant to last forever… They’re meant to remind us what’s possible.

    The first week of June was unforgettable—filled with moments that fill every part of you with excitement, achievement, and sheer joy.

    Dreams really did come true! It was the happiest I’ve been in a long time, after a year of navigating intense workloads, completing qualifications and huge grief, all while building up a business. So finally, I was feeling so excited and accomplished!

    But as the final experience that I’d been looking forward to ended, before my return to ‘reality’ I didn’t expect what happened next.

    The very next day – the crash

    Everything I’d looked forward to was over, the diary for the next three months was packed with work and I felt the sharp contrast between elation and routine, between limitless possibility and daily responsibility more than ever. My motivation was zero for two days, I had a low mood and a terrible headache.

    Luckily, I had a knowledge of what was happening – a big crash of dopamine. Intense highs trigger a surge of dopamine, which is the brains driver for motivation and pleasure. This is released more when in pursuit of goals or activities and when they are achieved or over, the levels drop considerably.

    This is where self-awareness and our survival kit needs to come out – this will look different to everyone but we must give ourselves space and self-compassion. Support ourselves while our brain recalibrates.

    Although the achievement was incredible – when I got into this crash, I then had the feeling that I wish there had been more, I should have done more, said more, been more present etc. etc. Trying to give myself the feeling of it wasn’t as good as it could have been. But my realistic brain is yelling ‘it was still better than you could have ever imagined, so why do you still want more?’


    So why does the crash happen?

    Anticipation vs. Achievement:

    The brain is wired to be more motivated during the pursuit of a goal, with dopamine releases associated with each milestone achieved. Once the goal is reached, the reward system won’t be as active.

    Seeking New Challenge:

    Humans are often driven to seek out new challenges and goals, making it natural to feel a sense of ‘empty’ or let down after a significant accomplishment.

    The day I felt back in some form of normal flow, I won the biggest contract I ever have since I started my business. But the same day I also could have won a second contract, not quite as big but still considerable; but this one fell through.

    So what did I do? Focused on the loss, not that absolute win of the first one! Again…why do we always want more?!

    As humans we are wired to always be in perfection, anything less is failure. We want it all! But that’s unsustainable and often unattainable.

    How do we mitigate the crash?

    Focus on the Process:

    Shift your focus from solely the destination to the journey itself, appreciating the steps and milestones along the way.

    Celebrate Milestones:

    Acknowledge and celebrate your progress toward a goal, not just the final achievement, to maintain dopamine levels and motivation.

    Set New Goals:

    Once a goal is achieved, set new ones to keep your brain actively engaged and seeking new rewards.

    Embrace Challenges:

    View challenges as opportunities for growth and learning, rather than as obstacles.

    Rest and Recharge:

    Allow yourself time to rest and recharge after achieving a major goal before setting new ones.

    A month later I went for a bigger job role in my employed work, back to my previous department in a role I’ve done before and loved. I got the job, meaning time will be a bit tighter. So not to say everything happens for a reason but I realised getting that second contract would have made work, business and life balance very tricky indeed. Maybe things are lined up for us somehow!

    As I’ve moved forwards since this experience, I’m fully back in flow but more equipped for the crash in future! I’m excited to go back to that amazing role that coincides with my business perfectly and I feel like I can make a big impact thanks to my knowledge and experience since I was there last… I’m starting to see that ‘squiggly career journey’ playing out every day, week, month. There is always meanders, flows and disappointments but sometimes there’s amazing high highs and terrible low lows. But that’s all part of the journey and our growth comes when we lean into it.

    As I come out of this reflection, I’m learning to welcome what comes from our experiences with curiosity and care. If this resonates with you, maybe it’s time to pause and ask—what does your survival kit look like when the dopamine dips?


    Here’s a few takeaways to keep you exploring!

    • Self-awareness is your greatest ally: Naming the emotional dip and understanding the neuroscience behind it helps shift guilt into compassion.
    • The pursuit holds the magic: Anticipation often brings more dopamine than the final achievement—so joy lives in the journey, not just the finish line.
    • Be gentle with ‘what if’ thoughts: Regret after the high is a trick of perception. Your inner voice might whisper “you should have done more,” but reality often says otherwise.
    • We’re wired to want more—so notice it without judgment: Recognising our perfectionist tendencies helps loosen their grip.
    • Recalibration is necessary, not indulgent: Rest is the bridge between impact and sustainability—build it intentionally.

    Let’s honour the highs, embrace the lows, and stay curious in the space between. That’s where growth quietly happens.