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Category: Change

  • The Music Always Makes Me Stay

    The Music Always Makes Me Stay

    It’s been a while since my last blog post… you might think after my last one, that I’ve been hidden away writing my book.

    I was so excited, so passionate and so motivated to write a story I knew I would love. But since April, I haven’t written a word.

    Despite the best of intentions and some excellent coaching sessions to prepare me, I didn’t keep momentum when things got very busy. Well, it’s ok, I thought, November is my deadline. Plenty of time, I’ll get back on track in June once things settle…

    Then the world ended. 
    Grandad passed away.
    Relatively unexpectedly and very suddenly.

    How to hold on to every spinning plate when you are spiralling out of control is near on impossible.

    Last year, after losing both grandmothers within 2 months, I wrote about stress and grief and the impact they can have both physically and mentally on us. I’ve had this in my mind during these last few months, particularly due to an ongoing shoulder injury causing a lot of pain. It’s all been so much weight to carry.

    So many times, my manager has said to me how amazed they are by my resilience. While I’m quick to make light that my only success to celebrate this year is the miracle of no sick leave – is that a success or stupidity?! A little of both I think!

    So, two months on without grandad, there’s a gaping hole in my life without him. We were inseparable, there was such a bond between us. I loved all of my grandparents so much, 18 months ago, 3 of them were very much still here… he was the last to go. I wasn’t ready.

    When I sat down to write this, I had little to say but I hoped the words might come. As a start, I went to my inspiration notes to see what sparked something in me, there they were – song lyrics can get us through so much.

    The first was a note I found that I made after a special event – an acoustic pre-show soundcheck by Nick Carter from Backstreet Boys (in case you didn’t know, my first love!). In the Q&A someone asked him is favourite Backstreet Boys lyric – he smiled and instantly sung:

    ‘As long as there’ll be music, we’ll be coming back again’

    (From their iconic – Everybody (Backstreets Back) anthem).

    No matter how far we walk from the path of life, the music always helps to guide us back. Whether it’s to lift our mood, celebrate events, help us feel something or give us the inspiration we need to get back up and keep going. This felt fitting and took me to one of my other favourites from another favourite – Kip Moore…

    ‘I’ve tried before to just walk away, but the music always makes me stay’

    My music, isn’t music itself. In the case of this metaphor, it’s writing. Throughout all of this pain, I’ve not felt any inspiration or interest, just the absolute essentials of work and business. But I’ve known what’s missing, I’ve heard that silent niggle – you need to write, book or blog, ‘just start creating and see what happens’.

    Grandad loved music, he loved people around him and he always wanted everyone to feel included and a part of the fun and memories we made. I made a promise in my dedication to him that I’d continue to do that for him.

    Music and lyrics have helped me create and shape a very corporate looking concept into a business that is all me – my creativity shines out of it.

    And, it’s took me until this point to mention, despite taking my foot off the gas recently, it’s continuing to grow and thrive and build my brand.

    I know every minute of work is creating this success, but the foundations are there for me to keep coming back to for the next path to tread.

    Ideas are starting to bubble for what the future could look like. I have a new timeline for my employed role, which has given me more space to plan the next chapter of the business, write the book at a steadier pace and most importantly start to heal and enjoy the beauty of life along the way…

    The music always makes me stay.

    Writing this reminded me that even in the hardest seasons, something always calls us back to ourselves.

    We all lose momentum when life shifts beneath us. What matters is recognising the moments that call us back – to our creativity, our purpose, our joy.

    What’s the ‘music’ in your life that helps you return to yourself when everything feels heavy?

  • Embracing Change: My Journey to Finding Purpose in 2024

    Embracing Change: My Journey to Finding Purpose in 2024

    This year, everything changed.

    Some things were so exciting I couldn’t keep still.

    Some hurt so bad it was hard to breathe.

    But that’s what life is right? That’s how it shapes us.

    Finding My Calling

    This year, for the first time in my life I understood what it meant to say you’ve found your calling. I truly have found mine and the move towards it now feels completely natural and not at all daunting.

    It’s so interesting to look back on the last 20 years to see how I’ve got here. Each twist and turn have led me to this big year of newness that feels so familiarly right. Why does it feel this way? Why do I feel so calm when everything is so uncertain?

    Embracing Change - My Journey to Finding Purpose
    Embracing Change - The Nature of Change

    The Nature of Change

    This got me thinking about change; it’s the one thing that’s inevitable to all of us and yet the thing we’re often most afraid of.

    When are we afraid of it? Usually when it’s unexpected and not planned. When it’s a difficult time, this is certainly the case.

    If it’s a change that we want, then we put all of our energy into focussing on that result. If we don’t get it, then what? What does that do to us and what impact is that having on us. If we do get the result we want, is it that everything is now ok, we’ve ‘made it’ and can now relax. But for how long? When will we become dissatisfied again and want more; therefore, more change?

    Learning and Growth

    In the past, I’ve not been one for change, often dealing with it in a really poor way. Blaming others or a greater force (or mostly myself) if I didn’t get what I wanted or felt I ‘deserved’. I tended to be just short of most achievements. Great, but never quite great enough, a second or third best in most situations. Looking back now, I think that’s still pretty good. But just because I didn’t get the ‘win’, the ‘golden ticket’, whether it be the job, the boy, the house, whatever, then it was a fail; I was a failure.

    Embracing Change - Learning and Growth

    Looking Back to Move Forward

    Embracing Change - Looking Back to Move Forward

    Only now, looking back, I see that it was me that could change it. Not the result as such, but the reaction to it and the story I told myself and those around me about it. The energy around a situation good or bad can impact us and the way we see ourselves and our lives dramatically. This alone, daring to look inwards, is the most powerful learning, I’ve ever done for myself.

    A few years down this personal development road, I’ve now began to use this to support my decisions and this is really helping my confidence. I trust my gut more and if I think that something isn’t good for me, even if I might really want it then I’m comfortable with steering myself away from it.

    I don’t get tempted to do something just because I feel I should. By gaining that control, I feel better about saying no and understanding that if it doesn’t feel good for me then it’s probably not.

    Since doing this, the doors around me seem to have opened up. I’ve put energy into myself and the paths I like the look of. Because they feel good, I’m enjoying them. Because I’m enjoying them, I’m seeing outcomes and positive results. It’s helping me attract the right things to me.

    I have no doubt that the next year will bring yet more change. So much of this can be unwanted. This year has been one of my hardest and one of my best at the same time. I’m not sure what to do with that math! But a few years ago, I tore this piece of advice out of a magazine, and I’ve carried it around in my purse. Now I’d like to share it with you as I think it sums up this writing perfectly:

    “Don’t stress. Life moves on, No matter what you’re doing, or stuck in, or are feeling, it will change. Just breathe and know that nothing is stuck, there’s always hope. Things always move. Don’t stay stagnant.”

    Conclusion: A Challenge for the new year

    My challenge to you is to look at what you really want but also what you really need. What feels good, what doesn’t and trust yourself to know what is right. If tough times come, embrace them, sit with it and heal from it. If greatness comes, be proud of it and know that you deserve it.

    As we step into the new year, let’s embrace each change with courage and hope, knowing that every twist and turn brings us closer to who we are meant to be.